If you want to know if your current spiritual practice has really been working for you this year, get together with your extended family this holiday season and watch yourself in action. Yes, a bit tongue and cheek, but within every joke lies some truth. And I know for myself that inevitably I find myself sucked back in to at least some of the family dynamics every year. The good news is, I always come away with knowing where my work still lies.
For a long time now I have been able to get together with the family and stand back and see everyone in action, playing their role, as if there truly was an unconscious script. Over the years I have attempted to break the mold little by little and put an end to behaviors in myself that I found distasteful. Each holiday I have made it through with varying amounts of success and over the years I have noticed that as I have changed the behaviors and reactions of others have changed as well. The holidays have actually become more pleasant for me and I hope for the others as well.
This year I have planned ahead and am creating a challenge for myself based on past holiday mishaps. For I notice I can still occasionally point out behaviors in others that they could be working on to better themselves (or at least make me feel more comfortable, LOL). When I think of it now, I cringe, knowing it is not helpful to anyone, including myself as it probably hinders my relationship with others rather than helps.
There is a Buddhist concept called Wu Wei, which encompasses action and non-action in a way that brings about "right action" or "effortless action." This year I am going to focus on the "non-action" part of this concept while I am with my family this holiday season. Basically, I am really going to work on observing and following through with keeping my mouth shut. I may not be able to control my thoughts, but I am certainly going to try and control my actions and not say a word as I watch everyone play their roles. As I embrace Wu Wei it is my hope that soon after, Acceptance will find its way in.
For this holiday season, I will practice Wu Wei and envision myself accepting whatever behaviors show up in myself and in others.
I'd also like to wish all of you a Blessed and Bountiful Thanksgiving Holiday.
