Every Fall I do a cleanse. What is a cleanse you ask? Over the years I've done many different kinds of cleanses, they've ranged from simply cleaning up my diet to taking bitter herbs for several weeks, to increasing my fiber intake and ingesting healing clays. The goal of the Fall cleanse has always been a physical and spiritual preparation for going deeper within during the long winter months.
This year I decided to take a slightly different path and chose a Parasite Cleanse. My first ever. After 48 hours or so, my entire upper body was covered with a rash. I wasn't sure what to make of it at first beyond the idea that perhaps I really did have parasites. On a physical level, I cut back on the amount of oils I was taking until the rash subsided and then slowly added the oils back in, this time taking less of the supplement than I did to start with. For the remainder of the first 21 day cycle I kept the dose down and remained rash free. I'm now taking a break from the oils for 7 days. Again 2 days in to the process I had another reaction. Better said, a revelation.
Tonight, it finally came into my awareness that I needed to ask myself "What bugs me?" or better yet "Who bugs me?" sort of like in a "Who sucks my life force?" kind of way. Some of you reading this may think that's ridiculous, others of you may just laugh at me, but for a long time now, I've used metaphors for my growth and evolution. Sort of like archetypes, these metaphors reveal themselves to me through my body, my home, my car, my relationships ,and the wonders of the natural world around me.
As I sat with the concept at first no one came to mind and then for a moment thought about it from the perspective of all of those over my lifetime who tried to suck my life force. When I opened my mind wide things became a bit more clear. You see, just yesterday, I had the opportunity to have something really bug me and I decided after seeing how angry I was getting at the prospect of doing something I didn't want to do, I stood up for myself and got myself out of the situation I didn't want to be in. In doing so, today I'm able to see how many times I did things for others not because I wanted to but because it was the nice thing to do, the right thing to do, or because they plane old wanted me to. What is that? I just did things for people without even considering myself, yep, I did. I told myself it was service, seva, selfless acts in service to others. Hmmm, no wonder why I felt like others were sucking my life force. They were, and I let them, through the very act of service without considering or consulting with myself.
Yesterday, I took a new movement, thanks to my Parasite Cleanse, I was able to rid myself of the phantom energy suckers. Free of that, I was able to see yesterday's circumstances clearly and finally be of service to myself, clearly stand up for myself, take care of myself, and walk away from something that was really bugging me.
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